Hm...
i cannot sleep now shitt!! man its already 1.30 am in the morning
im insomia now!!!
I cannot find the source why i cant sleep well in this night??
It's already 2 days past 2 day ago and yesterday...
Everytime i closed my eyes there was a problem that screwing my head...
2 days ago is about my scooter vespa...
now is about my class the pawerz
I've thinking that we will collect our money to make new clothes together a t-shirt i think...

And now i write this blog for conductible(menyalurkan) my thinking...
maybe after i wrote this journal my head will be better and i can go to sleep again because in 6 am in the morning that mearly 4 hours again i must wake up tu conduct my broter in to his campus at atmajaya university...

The things that bothering my mind is when i graduated from my college can i be successful person that will give a pride to my parents and my family???
or i will be a shamed person to my parents and family...
the things that bothered again every night before i sleep...
and what is the meaning of life and college....
so many questions in my head right now about this life...
thou i cannot find the answer in my contemplation(perenungan) before i go to sleep...
its almost 2 am in the morning and my damn eyes is not sleepy...

What can i do to be a successful person in my life to be a man that "Dewasa, beriman dan berilmu"
when will that things happen any suggestion...
can anyone give me the hint for that answer......
Where i must started....
are this night will be my turn out time for beeing a new person in after this night,be someone that grown up, that have faith in God and a person that smart in every field of life???

I must burn my vigorous (semangat) to be someone that new!!
A person that give a pride to my family, to my parents to everyone that now me!!!
to be a person that have faith in God, the person that smart in life(not a picky ones!!!),the person will be success in the rest of my life(whom dunno how long again i will stay in this world!!!)
a roman poet say this qoute Carpe diem quam minimum credula postero that is mean pluck the day or enjoy the moment , never trust the next...
i must change that qoute into memento mori is mean Remember that you are mortal and that means i don't have time to waste my time for playin any more..
Time to get serious everything....

Just one word belive....

like the song from the polar express that i watched yesterday

Believe in what your heart is saying,
Hear the melody that's playing.
There's no time to waste,
There so much to celebrate.
Believe in what you feel inside,
Give your dreams the wings to fly.
You have everything you need, if you just believe.